| February 1, 2007 | Keeping An Open Mind |
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The most powerfully divisive force is created in a relationship when a breach of trust occurs. Trust is like emotional glue that helps bond the couple. It is dependable and predictable, enabling each partner to feel secure in the other’s reliability. When trust is shaken or fractured it ruptures the very fabric of the relationship. This can develop when one partner lies, withholds information or even becomes secretive or unresponsive to simple questions. Reasons can vary for this type of behavior. The most obvious breach of trust occurs when a partner becomes unfaithful and has an affair or engages in sex with someone outside of his/her marriage. Adultery or infidelity can be the one symptom that acts like a dynamite cap, triggering the explosion that blows the relationship apart. There is no other single issue that creates as much uncertainty, doubt, disbelief and emotional disruption in a couple’s life. In this month’s Newsletter I discuss Infidelity, some of its causes and some ways to deal with it. This is a very complicated subject with many variables to consider. Therefore I intend to write more about it in future Newsletters. |
INFIDELITY
Most spouses or partners are completely unprepared emotionally when an affair is discovered. The shock is often so profound that they become paralyzed, unable to process just how terrible they really feel. The despair is so deep that it is akin to a sudden death of a loved one. One wonders how such a thing is even possible. How can a husband, wife or lover whom you have trusted with your deepest feelings betray you? Did you miss something? Were there signs that you chose to neglect... |
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Coping After An Affair
Once it has been discovered, an affair’s aftermath can be very ugly. If there is any hope for the individual or the couple to weather this event taking the time to reflect is critical. This tear in the fabric of the relationship often takes a long time and a lot of hard work to repair, so be prepared. Some suggestions for getting through this very difficult period are listed below. Don’t make hasty decisions. Despite feelings to the contrary, it is extremely important to let ... |
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