Newsletter

October 1, 2007 Keeping An Open Mind

All couples argue. Having disagreements, heated discussions or even a yelling match once in a while is common among almost all partners.

The trouble comes when disagreements or arguments get nasty and vicious. When partners become temporary enemies and perceive the other as dangerous, unsafe or cruel the stage is set for ugly combat.

Nobody wants to feel humiliated, demeaned or disrespected, especially by the one you love. Discussions can become very difficult to manage when one spouse can no longer trust the good intentions of the other.

In this month’s Newsletter I explore why some couples seem unable to stop arguing. These couples will often have terrible, ugly arguments that can fracture the foundation of the relationship. Even though they agree that the arguments are destroying their relationship they seem unable to break the cycle.

I welcome your comments or questions about this topic or any other topic you might be interested in. Please consider sharing this newsletter with friends or family th... Please read on

Why Couples Argue

Arguments will often result from poorly communicated messages that cause one of the partners to feel threatened, disrespected or unappreciated in some way. Often a person will tell the other how to behave using critical or provocative tones or language.

As a person becomes more stressed he or she will likely become more emotional as the emotional side of the brain takes over. Once a powerful emotional reaction gets triggered the logical or rational side of the brain ta... Please read on

Tips For Taking Charge

Turn Potential Fights into Productive Communication

In the previous article I pointed out that couples will often fight as a reflexive reaction to feeling threatened. This can happen even if the “threatening” partner had no intention of causing pain. That is how our emotional b... Please read on